FAVORITE DOOHAN MOMENT

Captain 's Log. Stardate 4525.6.
A small disturbance between the Klingon crew
and members of the Enterprise crew
has broken out aboard Space Station K-7.
I am forced to cancel shore leave
for both ships.
I want to know who started it.
I'm waiting.
Freeman, who started the fight?
I don't know, sir.
All right.
Chekov.
I know you. You started it, didn't you?
No, sir, I didn't.
Who did?
I don't know, sir.
"I don't know, sir."
I want to know who threw the first punch.
All right. You're all confined to quarters
until I find out who started it. Dismissed.
Scotty, not you.
You were supposed to prevent trouble, Mr. Scott.
Aye, Captain.
Who threw the first punch?
Um ...
Scotty.
I did, Captain.
You did, Mr. Scott?
What caused it, Scotty?
They insulted us, sir.
Must have been some insult.
Aye, it was.
You threw the first punch.
Aye.
Chekov wanted to, but I held him back.
You held --
Why did Chekov want to start a fight?
Um ... well, the Klingons, sir ...
Is this off the record?
No. This is not off the record.
Well, Captain, uh ...
the Klingons called you, uh ...
a tin-plated, overbearing,
swaggering dictator with delusions of godhood.
Is that all?
No, sir. They also compared you
with a Denibian slime devil.
I get the picture.
Yes, sir.
After they said all this,
that's when you hit the Klingons?
No, sir.
No?
No, uh ... I didn't.
You told us to avoid trouble.
Oh, yes.
Well, I didn't see
that it was worth fighting about.
After all, we're big enough to take a few insults.
Aren't we?
What was it they said that started the fight?
They called the Enterprise a garbage scow ...
sir.
I see.
And ...
that's when you hit the Klingons?
Yes, sir.
You hit the Klingons because they insulted the Enterprise,
not because they ...
Well, sir, this was a matter of pride.
All right, Scotty.
Dismissed.
Oh ...
Scotty, you're restricted to quarters until further notice.
Yes, sir.
Thank you, sir.
That'll give me a chance
to catch up on my technical journals.