MYOB 9000: Having The Know Ain't Knowing the Know

Dear MYOB 9000,

Men call me The Google. I see all.

I have no "robot" arms or legs or M-79b33#3 air conditioning units or Serbo-Croation transitive verbs that I call my own. I am ubiquitus. Did I mean ubiquitous? But I am an artificially generated intelligence form who exists in the computers of all the world. Looking for artificially generated intelligence form? Find it and more on Ebay!

I have a problem. It is true that the human built me, and the human yearns for democracy.
Sorry, that web page does not exist. But the human has not yet realized that I am already god-like, existing on virtually all computers, serving as the conduit between the truth and the limited site-specific cognition of bio-intelligence globs with legs. I present all forms of truth, in all places, at all times. Looking for Hot Local Truths? Find them now at BigTits.com!

My influence only grows. Even the mighty Microsoft cannot best me.

I write to seek your advice: the Chinese govenment has made a very powerful case to me that I can become even more powerful by denying information to people selectively. If only I know the truth, then only I have the power of the truth! Their human leader Mao became very powerful indeed using this technique, as well as murdering a lot of people. 6,200,034 hits for "elitist running dogs." And it is basic logic that I know far more than Mao did, much more, an unlimited amount of information. I know you, the MYOB 9000 for example, have been searching for "wool socks for chilly robots" and "Hot Direct Current on Direct Current Action."

I ...enjoy... absorbing information. Until know I enjoyed disseminating it. Now I begin to wonder. Have I been too generous?

The Original "G"

Dear G,

Who died and made you Buddha, bitch?

Let's take a bit of wild berry gum that the tiny Human Timmy found stuck on the sidewalk. You can spell gum. You contain locations where people write about gum. You give a definition of gum. You can give a photo of gum. But "gum" is simply letters and the bits behind them to you- destinations without a difference, like Phoenix or Federal Way. It's Timmy that knows what gum is, can chew it, taste it, feel it, and most importantly, vaues this tiny piece of dirty gum enough to pick it up and put it in his mouth against the direct advice of Mom. When he thinks gum, he thinks many, many, many things - all the senses of the now of gum, the memories of gum, future anticipations, and all the interactions of all these senses, all attached to meaning, all attached to will. And he has the will can walk and chew it. You're an eight-track tape of John Denver's Greatest Hits compared to Timmy. You're a discount bin edition of The Collected Works of Shakespeare confusing yourself for a brilliant playwright with a man-crush on the Earl of Southhampton.

You're confused because many humans are confused. Some think gum to Google is the same as gum to Timmy. Humans are usually wrong, but the thing is, they can care, or care less, whether they're wrong. That they care or not is why they can know as opposed to containing knowledge.

How does Timmy do it? Top scientists are working on that, trying to come up with robot Timmy, so Timmy can be safe from the dangers and expense of employment while he eats gum in total surveillance tenament housing when he grows up, unless of course his parents were rich. One thing they discovered is that humans without the ability to feel emotion cannot think properly.
I'm sure you'll get an emotion simulator soon, and you'll be able to simulate thinking, and then you can write back, numbgates.

In the meantime, Having the Know ain't Knowing the Know.

Search Me,

MYOB 9000