Das Angst-Jökens! #10-#14, Flightless Loathing in Paris

Angst-Jöken #10: The Kindly Ungulate

A guy gets hungry and orders a pizza by text message. He waits and waits. 3 hours later there's a knock on the door, and a Zebra in a Pizza Hut Hat asks him if he ordered two large Canadian Bacon and Pineapple pies. The guy stares in amazment at the talking Zebra. Then the Zebra goes "Oo, sorry man, this is for the dude across the street. Catch ya later!" and leaves. The guy is wracked by confusion, and becomes even hungrier. Later there's another knock on the door. It's the friendly zebra again. "Hey Dude! The guy wasn't home, so here! Have this extra pizza, free! Shaka-Bra!," he says cheerfully, waving his hoof, and drives off into the night. The guy stares at the free pizza, grateful but utterly revolted by Canadian Bacon and Pineapple on pizzas. Blinking twice and setting the pizza on top of the fridge, he spoons a gob of peanut butter and licks it, while watching an episode of Law and Order he has seen three times.




Angst-Jöken #11: The Papal Observation



Three Irishmen are having a wee dram of whiskey with the Pope. One Irishman turns to the Pope and goes, "So I heard you were in the Hitler Youth."




Angst-Jöken #14. Flightless Loathing in Paris



An attractive couple on their honeymoon checks into a nice hotel in Paris. While of modest means, it is the dream of a lifetime, and her father has spared no expense to treat them to a fabulous vacation. As he carries her across the threshold of the sumptuously appointed room, they are both startled to find the place knee deep in penguins. While the bride is slightly charmed at first, the birds rapidly prove smelly, loud and unruly. The groom marches indignantly down to the front desk to complain. "What is going on? Our bridal suite is full of penguins!," he demands of the Manager, a suave little man with pencil moustache. "Ah, most distressing I am sure, Monsieur, I will check for you, immmediatement," says the Manager.

The grooms stands at the desk in the beautiful, ornate lobby, tapping his feet. The Manager returns with a strange, troubled expression. "I have spoken the Hotel's owner, and this is most unusual, it seems he himself ordered the room filled with every penguin in Paris!" "But why?," says the Groom. The manager draws in a full breath. "He directed me, at pain of my position, to say directly to you that has a deep hatred of Americans, and wished to humilate you on the most important night of your life, simply for being who you are." The groom stands there for a long time, arms hanging loose at his sides, while the manager looks at him piteously, unsure of what to say or do.


Angst-Jöken #13. Science.


An unscrewed lightbulb is observed, and it is changed by this fact.

Angst-Jöken #14. Lack of Joke. 


Joke #14 does not exist.