This alone is Hall of Fame-worthy

On a large screen behind the bar, ESPN was broadcasting a tweet from the Cleveland Browns’ jet-setting rookie, Johnny Manziel, referring to [LeBron] James as “my guy.” 

“Who the fuck is Johnny Manziel?” [Andre] Reed asked. “LeBron ain’t your guy! You’re not ‘Johnny Football.’ You’re ‘Johnny Rookie Bitch.’ ”


That last part works particularly well when read aloud, at a slightly slower-than-normal pace, preferably by Samuel L. Jackson.

(link)