December 01, 2003

THIS AIRPLANE HALL OF FAME SUCKS

Let's try this again, and let's focus on what really matters: coolness.

10. SR-71 Blackbird. OK, no argument there.
9. The Boeing what-what? You want to talk mid-century flying boats, you're talking the PBY Catalina. And nothing else.
8. Carl Ben Eielson did everything people do in Cessnas and more, but he did it in a much cooler Lockheed Vega.
7. Hard to argue with the ME-262, turns out there might still be a few under the Berlin airport.
6. Curtiss Jenny my ass. Fokker Triplane!
5. P-51s have their following, as do Spits but the Corsair is cooler. I mean side-by-side it's AC/DC vs. Milli Vanilli.
4. The Flying Wing. If you insist on an operational bomber, may I recommend the B-70?
3. The X-15 is awesome, but the X-3 pegs the cool-ometer. The X-1? I'm sorry, and I hope an orderly arrives shortly with your medication.
2. The Starfighter. You might quibble that it couldn't turn, or carry a big payload, or dogfight. But if you're writing a paperback novel about a fighter pilot, this baby's going to be on the cover.
1. Cargo planes suck. The Goblin is the coolest plane ever.

Honorable Mention:
The Gee-Bee - "I'm sorry sir, but to win, someone has to have survived flying the aircraft."
The Morane Bullet
P-61 Black Widow
The Stealth Bomber
Gossamer Condor
Grumman Goose

...and if you must send a cargo plane, make mine a Lockheed Electra.

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