Eisengeiste Football League 2008 Season in Review
Final Results
- Playtechs (Corresponding Secretary General)
- Earmarky Marks (Laird of Madrona)
- The Mad Storks (anonymous)
- Monkey + ? = Profit! (The Sum of All Monkeys)
- The Peyton Putz (popmonkey)
- The Acerbic Welsh (Viceroy de los Osos)
- The Unimpeachables (Undersecretary to the Deputy Commissariat)
- Atomic Super Pirates (First Sea Lord)
The following are based purely on how things turned out, so the decisions involved might have been better or worse given what was known at the time. But, in fantasy football (as in so many things) getting lucky makes you a genius. I left The Unimpeachables and Atomic Super Pirates out of my analysis, because their owners didn't relly make any decisions during the season, apart from signing up for the league (I dunno, maybe FSL and the Undersecretary lost their computers, or their hands, or both.)
Worst draft boner
TIE
Tom Brady by the Acerbic Welsh (1st round, 7th pick overall). If you follow football, you know that Brady didn't make it through the first quarter of the first game of the season. Not a good return on your first-round pick investment.
Joseph Addai by Monkey + ? = Profit! (1st round, 5th pick overall). Addai was the fifth running back taken, but at the end of the season was ranked 38th in points scored by RBs. In my opinion, he was worse than Brady, because the Welsh dumped Brady after the first game of the season, while Monkey held on to Addai to the end, even starting him in the final game of the playoffs (which Addai missed entirely).
Best draft bargain
1. Thomas Jones by Playtechs. Drafted at the end of the eighth round, Jones finished the season number three among running backs. He'll probably go in the first round, next season.
2. Jay Cutler by the Acerbic Welsh. Drafted in the early 12th round. Cutler finished number three among quarterbacks this season, making up for the loss of Tom Brady.
Best draft overall
Playtechs. Eleven of her 15 players drafted were still on the squad at the end of the season (next closest was eight out of 15). In addition to the Thomas Jones bargain, she got two top-five wide receivers (Anquan Boldin and Andre Johnson), the top tight end (Tony Gonzalez), and the top defense (Baltimore).
Worst draft overall
The Acerbic Welsh. Apart from Jay Cutler, the only bright spots were the kickers (Rob Bironas and David Akers). The rest ranged from the underachievers to the unplayable. Tragic picks include the aforementioned Tom Brady, T.J. Houshmandzadeh (3rd round), Kellen Winslow (5th), Willis McGahee (7th), Willie Parker (10th), Joey Galloway (11th), and Alge Crumpler (14th).
Best free agent acquisitions
1. DeAngelo Williams by the Mad Storks. Twenty-four running backs were picked in the draft, and none of them were DeAngelo Williams, who finished the season with the most points scored by an RB. This is especially impressive when you consider that he didn't have a good showing until game 5.
2. Antonio Bryant and Vincent Jackson by Monkey + ? = Profit! Playable wide receivers were hunted to extinction this season, but Monkey reeled in both Bryant and Jackson, who finished the season 9th and 12th, respectively.
3. Steve Slaton and Chris Johnson by the Acerbic Welsh. Slaton and Johnson (finishing 8th and 10th) made up for drafted lamesters Willis McGahee and Willie Parker.
Worst cut
1. Tennessee defense by the Mad Storks. Before the first game of the season, the Storks send Tennessee packing. They went on to be the second highest scoring defense (for the Acerbic Welsh).
2. Owen Daniels by Monkey + ? = Profit! Monkey drops the Texans tight end after the second game. Owens goes on to rank number six (in the service of the Mad Storks), while Monkey scraped for inferior free agents.
3. Dwayne Bowe by the Mad Storks. Dropping Dwayne Bowe would have worked out okay (he only ranked 17th for the season) if Storks had better wide receivers on his roster (better than Braylon Edwards and Lee Evans, who came in 24th and 30th).
Honorable mentions: Ronnie Brown and Rob Bironas by the Acerbic Welsh, and Chris Cooley by Earmarky Marks.
posted by VMM at 3:26 AM
4 Comments:
I'm not in third place, YOU'RE in third place! Whatever that means...
I'm afraid the storks get underachievers of the year - highest points scored, but we "pulled a Shottenheimer" in the Big Game.
Lemme look again... no YOU'RE in third place, Shottenheimer...
This is really well thought out. May I refer to it as I bitch about fantasy football to anyone who will listen?
Can't wait 'till next year.
Football is a team sport, and the Storks win or lose as a team. And this year, we, as a team, blame our disappointing performance on Braylon Edwards.
Without fantasy football I'd have no idea what a flaming s---heel this guy is. And he was designated as a no-waiver, so I was stuck with him all year.
Why do I dislike him? Let me count the ways...
- Three touchdowns, 18 drops.
- He wants to be in show business.
- $17 million, guaranteed.
- He says: "...I've learned how to overcome adversity. I'm also proud of how much my foundation has taken off. I've been doing all this community service in Cleveland. My charity efforts will only be in Detroit from now on."
- And, after all that, he thinks people hate him because he played at Michigan.
Whatta maroon.
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