Iced Zen: "Mitt Romney's Status Updates"

"Car elevator out of service - at least the maid elevator is working!"

"I like being able to to fire people, but it is simply is not true to say that I really enjoy their crying and begging and their humiliating posture of submission and despair."

"Ha-Ha, my wife reminded me about that time Dad shot an Indian he caught on the property."

"People call me stiff and unfeeling. But that doesn't make me feel bad. Nothing does. "

"Call me a racist, but the Swiss make the best oatmeal!"

"Taco Bell is a restaurant???? And here I thought it was a bell store! "

"Woke up and smelled the coffee. Not in my house!  Sorry to have to let the cook go."

"Does every pilot have to act like HE owns your jet?!"

"Great to meet Donald Trump - a stellar example of what the middle class can accomplish in this country when the government gets out of the way." 

 "My children are helping me grow to understand the plight of the poor by showing me photographs of them shopping at Target. " 

"I'd have to say my favorite ethnic minority is Latvians."

"Hey Barack Obama - the American people are tired being told of what kind of yacht to buy!"

"I am completely for a woman's right to be protected by the smartest men from making the wrong decisions."

"Which house did I leave the mansion keys in THIS time??"