Before the Clock Chimes Midnight

Dr. X posts this from the Mean Regression Archive at Stanford (20-3 over the Washington Huskies) University:

"Let me just say this. I have a certain empathy for middle-aged men from the Pacific Northwest. Men who live perhaps somewhat ordinary lives, but are capable, when called upon, to step into the breach and de-fucking-liver. It is a matter of honor among us, born of long, silent treks through the snow and darkness, accompanied only by the sound of our own breath and the howling of wolves over the carcass of a lichen-fatted ungulate.

"And so we raise a glass to Yakima's own Damon Huard, before the curtain falls. He came out of nowhere this year to give his team superb play at the quarterback position - an exceptional, world-class performance. But this too, shall pass - Trent Green is feeling better now, and warming up on the sidelines. Soon Mr. Huard will be re-issued his clipboard and shunted off to the margins, back to the familiar chill of obscurity. The Mercury News has the story.

"Before that dark hour arrives, we honor you Damon. Of course, change is inevitable. It is what it is. One must know one's place. Not everyone can be a full-time NFL starting quarterback like Joey Harrington or Aaron Walter.

"Unless...unless some GM comes to his senses and realizes his team needs solid, mistake-free football at the quarterback position. And falls from the sofa like Saul on the road to Damascus shouting - 'get me a real quarterback - get me Damon Huard, dammit!'

"When that day comes, Damon, we know you'll be ready. And we'll be there rooting for you.

"Top five IAYPA YTD (200 attempts minimum):

"1. Donovan McNabb, 7.5 - Suck it Limbaugh
"2. Peyton Manning, 7.4 - Not bad, could develop into a good player.
"3. Damon Huard, 7.4 - Saaa-LUTE
"4. Marc Bulger, 7.3 - Thank you Mr. Holt and Mr. Bruce.
"5. Philip Rivers, 7.1 - They said he had a weak arm. They were wrong.

"Fewest interceptions by a quarterback with more than 200 attempts this season: Damon Huard - 1."