Leading Contenders for the Isengard.Gov Presidential/ V.P. Endorsement

Based on guesses about popularity alone, I would say these are, in order, the leading contenders for the Isengard.Gov Presidential and Vice Presidential endorsements.




1. OBAMA/TATUPU

Smarts, hope, agility. Also, fun to say.




2. GORE/THE LATE KURT VONNEGUT

If there was any justice in this world.




3. EDWARDS/ THURMAN

Uma would bring a little more gravitas to the ticket.





4. BIDEN/ FLAV

Joe Biden would be a well-spoken, thoroughly competent president, and Flav already has the vice-president hat.





5. DODD/SILVERMAN

Dodd's tremendous eloquence and deep love of our constitutional democracy is unquestionable, undone only by living in the Senate rather than in America. Sarah Silverman? The skill sets, I believe, are complementary.





6. RICHARDSON/ WINNINGNEST KITTEN ON KITTENWAR.COM

For a warmer, fuzzier America. Note: Kitten Veeps are replaced as needed.



7. KUCINICH/ ODIN, GOD LORD OF THE GODS

Kucinich is right about a lot of things, and he's no Nader. But this intelligent and courageous man has a hard time beating a weak image. Odin balances the ticket with actual God experience in war, death, prophetic poetry, and he will know what to do as we face Ragnarok, the apocalyptic last battle of the gods, which will tear asunder the known world, but may be faced with ...holy shit, look at Kucinich's wife!

Odin is pleased.



8. CLINTON/ELMO

Clinton would be an effective President of the United States, and an infinite improvement over anyone from the other side. Ultimately she's more or less on the right side. But attempts to soften her image are pointless and tend to backfire - I say go all the way and let the ticket do the counting, at least from 1 to 10.