Clearing up an apparent misunderstanding

Someone seems to have gotten the impression that this is a liberal blog, and yes, I suppose it is liberal, if by liberal you mean in the sense of liberty with human values, opposed to all forms of dictatorship, be they fascist, communist, or religionist. We do favor job training for the unemployed, medical care for sick people, and a society in which basic civil rights are respected. But we are implacably opposed to dictatorship in all its forms.

"Opposed" is an odd word, isn't it? Republicans are "opposed" to abortion, yet do very little to address the underlying causes of unwanted pregnancies. Democrats are "opposed" to union busting and NAFTA, and yet the other side always finds just enough votes, don't they?

I don't mean that kind of "opposed".

And I don't mean bake-sale, nonviolent civil disobedience, Jimmy Carter hugging-type opposed, either.

I mean the kind of opposed where you keep a secret cache of weapons in the mountains and retreat there when the Russians come, and then one night after things have settled down a bit you sneak onto their base, mortar their command post, hit their ammo dump with a flamethrower, and then open fire randomly on them as they run in all directions:

Standard Alaskan Boy Daydream ca. 1973


All fantasy, of course, although I would be happy to compare my own military record with that of, say, Richard Cheney.

You might ask why a child would have such thoughts - and, importantly for understanding several of this blog's contributors, why would a whole bunch of children have such thoughts?

Well, because the threat appeared real in those days, and it was right there. Alaska was in the thick of the Cold War and armed to the teeth. The National Guard eskimo units were locked and loaded. The Russian Air Force was playing tag with the guys at Elmendorf and Eielson (at Eielson they miss this so much they still do it on their own). The Russians were shooting down airliners just to show how tough they were.

(Memo to the Russians: before attacking Alaska, note that there are roughly 23,000 active duty military in the State, along with 7,000 National Guard and 74,000 military veterans. That's roughly 100,000 effectives in a pinch, before the kids with Winchesters show up. As a point of comparison, the entire British Army is 150,000.)

Like all children, we were ready to do our part. I often remind my sons that in my day (and I'm sure the Laird and the Viceroy will back me up on this) children routinely memorized Washington's 1776 General Orders:

The time is now near at hand which must probably determine, whether Americans are to be, Freemen, or Slaves; whether they are to have any property they can call their own; whether their Houses, and Farms, are to be pillaged and destroyed, and they consigned to a State of Wretchedness from which no human efforts will probably deliver them.

The fate of unborn Millions will now depend, under God, on the Courage and Conduct of this army -- Our cruel and unrelenting Enemy leaves us no choice but a brave resistance, or the most abject submission; this is all we can expect -- We have therefore to resolve to conquer or die: Our own Country's Honor, all call upon us for a vigorous and manly exertion, and if we now shamefully fail, we shall become infamous to the whole world.

Let us therefore rely upon the goodness of the Cause, and the aid of the supreme Being, in whose hands Victory is, to animate and encourage us to great and noble Actions -- The Eyes of all our Countrymen are now upon us, and we shall have their blessings, and praises, if happily we are the instruments of saving them from the Tyranny meditated against them. Let us therefore animate and encourage each other, and shew the whole world, that a Freeman contending for LIBERTY on his own ground is superior to any slavish mercenary on earth.

Red Dawn covered the Russian invasion fantasy world pretty well, I thought. Even though consensus says the threat has passed , you can still get the t-shirt. That's probably safer than the flamethrower, anyway...

Eisengeiste: soft on people, tough on dictatorship.

Prospective commenters, note this well.