August 01, 2009

Seriously, he's suffered enough

He did hard time. He gave up millions in wages. He lost his shoe contract.

As Christians, secular humanists, and dialectical materialists with human characteristics - can't we find it in our hearts to forgive him? Isn't it time to let the healing begin? Seattle is an enlightened, nurturing place, sheltered from the glare of national media attention - a place where he can work with his spiritual advisers to make himself a better man. If not now, when? If not here, where?

He has averaged more yards per carry than any other player in the history of the game.

11 Comments:

Blogger VMM said...

I've said it here, before, and I'll say it again: no team needs to find out how much Americans love dogs that badly.

August 1, 2009 at 11:50 AM  
Blogger The Front said...

Dude, no one can tackle him. He has to produce from day 1 just to pay his lawyers. He is rested, fit, and would rush for 1,000 totally fucking awesome yards.

There is no defense in his division built to defense Michael Vick. He will totally dominate.

(Why yes, I'll have another beer...)

Christ, it's not like he stole Lance Armstrong's bike or something!

August 1, 2009 at 11:56 AM  
Blogger VMM said...

Anyway, I think this is a bogus rumor. The credibility of the idea is solely based on the fact that the new Seahawks coach, Jim Mora, used to be Vick's head coach on the Falcons. But Mora doesn't make personnel decisions for the Seahawks, Tim Ruskell does, and Ruskell is doesn't do problem children. This is why Jeremy Stevens is a Buccaneer, and Aaron Curry is a Seahawk.

August 1, 2009 at 12:02 PM  
Blogger VMM said...

This just in: the Vikings may need a quarterback.

August 1, 2009 at 12:11 PM  
Blogger The Front said...

Have you already forgotten the Ranier parley?

Book it, done.

August 1, 2009 at 12:18 PM  
Blogger VMM said...

Let's put money on it.

August 1, 2009 at 12:32 PM  
Blogger The Front said...

I cannot believe you would sully this honorable conversation with considerations of money.

August 2, 2009 at 10:42 AM  
Blogger VMM said...

Nice -- well played, Sir!

August 2, 2009 at 12:03 PM  
Blogger Lee Harvey said...

Buddha's flaccid bladder, why get Vick when you can get 300 lbs of speed and reckless abandon from Jared Lorenzen? He used to line up at wideout at Kentucky!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynMZkDKmhE0

August 5, 2009 at 10:07 AM  
Blogger JAB said...

"Buddha's flaccid bladder?" 4 out of 5 stars for that.

August 6, 2009 at 12:17 PM  
Blogger The Front said...

Lee Harvey, you are now an offically approved commenter on this blog.

August 6, 2009 at 11:05 PM  

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