Licorice The Hamster Saves America
I was a total sucker for this story from Alexandra Kerry. In case you missed it, this was brilliant politics for humanizing the Wonk's Wonk, hilarious, short, touching.
We were standing on a dock waiting for a boat to take us on a summer trip. Vanessa, the scientist, had packed all her animals including her favorite hamster. Our over-zealous golden retriever got tangled in his leash and knocked the hamster cage off the dock. We watched as Licorice, the unlucky hamster bubbled down to a watery doom. That might have been the end of the story. But my dad jumped in, grabbed an oar, fished the cage from the water, hunched over the soggy hamster and began to administer CPR. There were some reports of mouth-to-mouth, but, I admit that’s probably a trick of memory. He was never quite right after that, but Licorice lived. Like I said, it may sound silly. We still laugh about it today. But, to us it was serious and that’s what mattered to my father.
The subtext, and I'm thinking it was choosen deliberately, the overzealous goldren retriever reminds us of Bush. Licorice, and us, were sinking.
Hail to Licorice the Hamster. We honor your sacrifice.
posted by JAB at 11:43 PM
1 Comments:
What they didn't tell you is that enraged by the behavior of his golden retriever, Kerry took it by the tail and hurrled the dog into the exposed propeller of a taxiing float plane. He then cut off his daughter's pinky with a hunting knife for being so stupid as to leave the hamster in an exposed position and forced his wife to eat the bloody, detatched finger for raising such stupid children. Still, he's got my vote.
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