Your Papers Are Not in Order

I took the day off to talk to the government. The wife and kids and I went down to the passport office to apply for a passport for the baby. Babies have to have passports, you see, there's no telling what they'd get up to if they didn't have proper identification at all times. In fact I'm told several baby-nappings have been resolved quite favorably when the child hailed a police officer, showed a valid passport, and was returned safely to hearth and home.

But there was a line.

First up was an old man who needed a new passport. His old one had expired, but he'd brought it along. He walked with a cane. But he had not filled out the application. Can't have a passport without an application. OK, is there somewhere I could sit down and fill out the form? No, this is a post office, there are no chairs. Figure it out at home, old man.

Next up was a father trying to get passport renewals for his two sons, aged 14 and 16. Ha! He didn't know that all applicants over 14 must appear in person. Next.

We were up. This should be a cakewalk, I thought. We've got the kids, we've got our forms all filled out and signed. Ha, what a fool. We signed the forms. It says very clearly in 8-point print that the form is not to be signed until the oath is administed! Sorry, can we sign again? No. Can we show you valid ID proving that these are our signatures? No.

So we went and re-filled out the form, got back in line, waited, took the oath, signed the form, and went home. If all goes well, our little baby will be able to prove his identity instantly any time any representative our national security services wishes it. God bless America.

I hear Kuala Lumpur's lovely this time of year.