Those Were Mostly Trumped Up Charges
Dr. X posts this from the Arctic Roadrunner, over a nice order of onion rings:
"Rumors that some Steller alumnae have become violent cannibal rapists are untrue, mostly. It is well-known that we have the problem fairly-well under control, or at least reasonably contained within the 'beige zone'.
"Unavailable for comment:
"Let me just say this to 'Representative Thomas Anderson', if that is your real name. We presume you are innocent.
"However. If you are, in fact guilty, you will become the biggest asswipe to have ever passed through the halls of our alma mater.
"We wish you, your family, and your legal defense team the best. We look forward to either your complete exoneration, or else a formal abasement ceremony following your release.
"Should you choose to not perform the abasement ceremony, one will be performed for you, featuring a life-sized cutout of Roseanne Barr with your face pasted on it."
posted by Latouche at Large at 1:15 AM
3 Comments:
Mmmmmm...Arctic Roadrunner. M. and I ate there this summer. It really hasn't changed much. I had an Arctic Cheese and onion rings. So...good...
I'm starting to maybe remember who Tom Anderson was, or at least I think so. He was younger than us, in Jane Crane's home-room group, I think. Or am I thinking of someone else?
Don't you remember? He was that guy everyone was always mistaking for Tom Andrews.
This did not become truly embarassing for him until he started to date.
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